Manny being Manny The Latest twist in the Steroid Saga

Steroids has officially gone postal.The list of all-star players who have been revealed to be using steroids: Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Mark McGwire, Rafael Palmeiro, Andy Pettitte, Jason Giambi, Miguel Tejada, Alex Rodriguez, now…….MANNY RAMIREZ.It makes sense when you think about it. The baggy uniform. The dreads to cover up his huge head (they all have huge heads). How he erupted last year when he was with the Red Sox and practically mauled a team assistant. How he always used to spend time in the Green Monster and no one would question what he was doing. This brings us to my theory.My theory of why Manny started juicing is because upon signing with the Sox, at his press conference, he swore to the front office, the media, and the Fenway Faithful that he was going to BEAT THE YANKEES. I’m sure he woke up the next morning, in an empty Boston apartment full of scattered Tecates, and uttered…”What happened last night?” It’s like when you’re drunk and you get carried away, you end up doing something you regret. Either you make a bad dance move, throw the ping pong ball into some girl’s boobs at beer pong, or in Manny’s case, make a promise to beat the most bad-ass dynasty in baseball at the time. Oops.So the next morning, Manny calls up his friend. Say his friend’s name is, um…”Big Papi.” Let’s call him that for now. “Big Papi” offers Manny something that can help him beat the Yankees.