How Many Nights In Paris Must We Suffer?

This has to be a publicity stunt.  For the past few nights since her tragic breakup, Paris Hilton has been seen in various nightclubshanging out with Cristiano Ronoldo — he’s some hot soccer player — and there have been reports of them heading to Nicky Hilton’s home afterwards.  She cannot already have a new boyfriend.  There must be a 48-hour-waiting period between penises.  It’s a rule.

Here’s Paris with her sister, stumbling around outside MyHouse in Los Angeles last night.

I hope Paris finds “the one.”  You know, the guy that can accept her, genital warts and all.  (I take no credit for that.  Those words came directly out of the mouth of — gasp!– my mother.  You see where I get it from.) 

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How Many Nights In Paris Must We Suffer?
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