Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison Were Kicked Off a Pumpkin Patch for Fornicating

You know, every time I try to type “Doug,” you know what comes out? “Dough.” I just can’t stop it. Even consciously trying *not* to type “Dough,” it happens. Like in that first sentence there. Which I suppose is appropriate, because the “Doug” in question is probably puffy, yeasty, clammy, and spoiled-milk-colored underneath those clothes. Consider me grossed the f*ck out.

Anyway, these two idiots were removed from a family-friendly pumpkin patch this past weekend for – you guessed it – exhibiting really gross behavior, behavior that should never occur between a child and a granddad. I don’t really have much else to say about these two other than, “Courtney Stodden. Wake the hell up.” And Doug Hutchison, “You are one nasty man, corrupting this young woman who looks positively prepubescent from the waist down.” I mean, does this girl even get her period yet? Or is that their clever ploy in birth control innovation?

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Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison Were Kicked Off a Pumpkin Patch for Fornicating
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