Chris Brown Is Breeding Pit Bulls

Do you ever wonder if Chris Brown actually tries to be an asshole? Like maybe in reality he’s this calm, collected dude, and one day he figured that if he set out to be one of the most ridiculously awful celebrities out there, he’d stand out. He’d get a lot of attention and a lot of press, and he’d get more famous than he would have if he was just another semi-talented singer. Maybe it’s all an act.

But nah, I don’t think it is. I think Chris just really is that much of a dick, and this latest news just goes to show how true that is.

See, a few days ago, Chris’ mom tweeted “CHRIS BROWN PUPPIES FOR SALE,” and linked to this site where you can purchase a little pit bull puppy for a mere $1,000 each. But be careful, because even though “dogs can be delivered depending on buyers’ location,” the price of shipping is “not included in the sale price.” Also be careful because this is f-cking ridiculous and stupid and sad.

Listen, there might be some reasons why you’d want to buy a dog. Maybe you need a dog to perform a certain service or a job or something, or maybe … no, I don’t know why you’d want to buy a dog when there are so, so many up for adoption. I also don’t know why you’d want to buy a pit bull, much less a pit bull from Chris Brown. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely adore these dogs, and I made good friends with one myself last summer, but pit bulls often require a whole lot of training in order to be good with children or other animals, and somehow I don’t think Chris Brown has done all that much work with these precious puppies. Oh, and not to mention that if you absolutely have to breed dogs (you don’t), you need to have a whole lot of knowledge about the dogs you’re breeding: their history, their temperament, their parents. Again, somehow I don’t think Chris Brown has done all that.

Oh, sorry, you weren’t looking for a reason to like Chris Brown, were you? You’re not going to get mad at me because it’s been like four whole days since he started trying to sell puppies for a thousand dollars and I need to let it go, are you? Let me guess: it’s not like I’m perfect or like I’ve never made mistakes, is it? I need to let him live his life, even though by breeding and selling puppies, he made sure that a few dogs in shelters won’t get to live theirs.

What a dick.

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